This journey we call life can really sucks sometimes. It really can. And people who tell you otherwise are lying.
At one time or another we’ve all experienced disappointment, failure, fear and despair. We all know what it feels like to not get promotion we wanted, to have our heart broken, to be let down and to lose someone we cherished. It truly sucks.
And let’s admit it, when things don’t go our way, sometimes it feels REALLY good to wallow in our disappointment and misery. In a weird way, wallowing feels warm and comfortable. It’s a place we know. Like an old friend, it’s familiar and allows us to indulge ourselves. It understands us really well.
But let’s not fool ourselves, my friends.
You know what else misery does REALLY well? It starves our soul. It eats away at our spirit, our existence and our potential.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying that feeling miserable after a disappointing event is a bad thing, because it’s not. It’s normal. Allowing yourself to wallow for a while and feel (really FEEEEEEL) is an important part of healing. But what’s dangerous is allowing failure, fear and despair to infuse your entire being. The longer you allow this to happen, the harder it will be to get out of the funk. Put another way, the longer wallowing becomes your default position, the harder it is to press the restart button.
I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to live a life that’s devoid of joy and wonder and laughter!
So, what do you do next time you’re feeling as though life has dealt you a nasty blow? Start by asking yourself these questions:
1. What’s the silver lining in all this for me (trust me, there’s ALWAYS a silver lining!)?
2. What’s the lesson I need to learn?
3. What aspects of my life bring me joy?
4. What can I do to focus more on the joy in my life rather than the disappointment I’m feeling right now?
Whatever is you want in this life, believe me when I say, focusing on JOY and positivity rather than despair, stacks the odds in your favour towards you achieving your goals.
I can’t guarantee that you’ll never be disappointed, hurt or upset again, but I CAN guarantee that if you let misery ‘win’, the likelihood of achieving whatever you want in this life will dramatically decrease. There’re no ands, ifs, or buts about it. It’s simply the truth!
It’s not always easy to ‘turn a smile upside down’, but if you start looking for the hope, peace and joy in every situation, there’s a good chance disappointments that come your way in the future won’t feel so debilitating.
You deserve to live a life that’s full of everything that’s good, positive and fulfilling. So, don’t let set-backs define your life. Let joy guide your journey. Start today!
Okay, so we all know that managing yourself through the whole pregnancy, career, motherhood, professional life thing is hard! REALLY. HARD.
But do you know the actual statistics associated with pregnant working women and return-to-work mums in Australia? If not, keep reading because you may be shocked…
According to the Human Rights Commission of Australia:
84% of women reported mental and physical stress, and damage to their finances and career during pregnancy and parental leave! No, that was not a typo – it’s EIGHTY. FOUR. PERCENT!
The Australian Bureau of Statistics breaks it down for us a bit more:
54% of women believe that their careers have been affected by taking maternity leave.
30% of women believe their careers took a backward step during maternity leave?
44% of women’s salaries stalked after taking maternity leave?
33% of mothers did not return to the workforce after taking maternity leave?
33% of new mothers felt they didn’t fit in anymore, on returning to their jobs?
I’m sure you’d agree – these statistics are astonishing and unacceptable! Please understand – I haven’t posted them to scare you, I’ve posted them because as Oprah says, “Knowledge is POWER”! And I want you to be powered-up!
Despite the business world’s move towards developing more inclusive workplaces, there’s obviously still a long way to go! So, if you’re pregnant, or returning to work after taking parental leave, PLEASE EDUCATE YOURSELF and pleeeeeease know your rights! I guarantee that you’ll be glad you did.
Here’s a link you’ll find useful: https://www.fairwork.gov.au/le…/maternity-and-parental-leave
For coaching on how to successfully negotiate and manage your impending maternity leave and/or return to work transition (and how not to become a statistic), please contact me firstname.lastname@example.org I’d love to help!🌺
#maternity #motherhood #mothers #career #women #workingwomen#maternityleave #children #kids #parenting #stayathomemum #mums#moms #stayathomemom #returntowork #maternitycoaching #corporate#business #leadership #manager #milanamaternitycoaching #success#inspiration #influence #wisdom #like #follow
Fear. Ugh. We’ve all experienced it. All of us, at one time or another have had those annoying, self-sabotaging, limiting thoughts that have stopped us from moving forward from eg. a broken relationship, or applying for the job we really want, or having that conversations we need to have, or pursuing the life we want for ourselves.
The irony of course is, that by having these thoughts, the very thing we want so much is the very thing we stop ourselves from getting! Yes – it IS as silly as it sounds!
But I’m going to let you in on a little secret – most of the time, the ‘fear’ we feel is not real. It’s built on ‘stories’ we tell ourselves based on our conditioning, our vulnerabilities and our past experiences. Don’t get me wrong. The conditioning, the vulnerabilities and the past experiences are indeed REAL, but the stories we tell ourselves about them – the ones that say, ‘you tried before and you failed, so why bother’ and ‘you can’t do that so don’t even try’, are NOT. They are self-defeating thoughts that are based on falsehoods.
We all stumble and fall in life. No one wins 100% of the time. But what I CAN tell you this – being reluctant to start something new, procrastinating, or feeling as though you’re going to fail even before you’ve begun, will not help you get to where you want to go. Staying in your comfort zone is not as comfortable as you tell yourself it is! Let me put it another way – what would give you more satisfaction – actually trying, or living with the regret of not even having a go because of fear?
So, next time fear of failure paralyses you to the point where you’d rather do ANYTHING except what you could be doing, ask yourself:
1. What’s holding me back?
2. How is my conditioning or past experiences influencing how I’m feeling?
3. If I wasn’t fearful, what would I do today to move me one step further towards my goal?
You deserve to try again and you deserve to start something new and wonderful. Most of all, you deserve to pursue whatever it is that makes you happy!
Fear may not be real, but your goals are. Start taking action today. You’ll be glad you did.
#maternity #motherhood #mothers #career #women #workingwomen#maternityleave #children #kids #parenting #stayathomemum #mums#moms #stayathomemom #returntowork #maternitycoaching #corporate#business #businesscoaching #leadership #manager #management#milanamaternitycoaching #success #inspiration #influence #wisdom #like#follow #thankyouforyoursupport
Ever had one if those days when your ‘To Do’ is a mile long, but for the life of you don’t know how to begin tackling it?
As the list grows, so too do our anxiety levels, and we start to feel overwhelmed. For working mums (I include stay-at-home-mums in this, because let’s face it, ALL mums are working mums!), this is especially true.
Let me start by saying this – you’re not alone. Feeling overwhelmed by the pressure we put ourselves is unfortunately becoming more and more common these days. Today, more than ever, we have more choices, more responsibilities, more meetings, more school functions, more washing/cleaning/ironing, more this and more that. I’m sure you’d agree, it’s exhausting!
As much as we’d like to achieve everything we want within a 24 hour cycle, sometimes it’s just not realistic. Of course, the difficulty with this is – the more we don’t do today, the more we have to do tomorrow and the next day and the next. Before we know it, our ‘To Do’ list is the size of Mt Vesuvius!
So what can you do when you start feeling overwhelmed by how much you need to achieve toda
y? Start by asking yourself these questions:
1. What’s on my ‘MUST Do’ list today, as opposed to my ‘To Do’ list?
2. Who says these tasks are important? (Me, my partner, my boss, society?)
3. What is it about saying ‘No’ that makes me feel guilty?
The best way to manage feelings of being overwhelmed is to start questioning your own assumptions. There’s always a difference between what you ‘should’ and what you ‘must’ do. The world’s not going to stop if you cut yourself a bit of slack. Be kind to yourself. Everything will get done.
#maternity #motherhood #mothers #career #women #workingwomen#maternityleave #children #kids #parenting #stayathomemum #mums#moms #stayathomemom #returntowork #maternitycoaching #corporate#business #businesscoaching #leader #leadership#milanamaternitycoaching #melbourne #success #inspiration #influence#wisdom #like #follow #thankyouforyoursupport
Okay now, let’s be honest. What woman reading this has not been guilty of comparing herself to another woman from time to time? Who hasn’t at one point or another sized herself up against a fellow Sistah? And who hasn’t secretly wished, “If only I was better/ more accomplished/ a more organised working Mum/ a more efficient stay-at-home Mum than her”?
I think it’s safe to say that ALL of us, (some more frequently than others), have succumbed to measuring our progress and achievements against other women’s .
But why do we do it? And even more interesting – why do we invariably feel that every other woman on this planet is doing a better job than we are? Because most of the time, it’s simply not true!
(Read this next bit slowly and carefully. Repeat as many times as necessary) Comparing yourself to anyone other than the person you were yesterday is a never-ending downward spiral of self-sabotage that ends up making you feel incompetent and ‘less than’.
Hardly productive thinking, right?
So what can you do to stop yourself getting trapped on this slippery slope to, ‘Now I feel more awful about myself than I was before’?
Start by asking yourself:
1. What purpose is comparing myself to others serving?….More often than not, we compare ourselves unfavourably to others because it subconsciously keeps us in our ‘safe zone’. It’s as if it justifies us not moving forward, because, hey, what’s the point! See how that’s self-sabotage?
2. What makes me unique as a pregnant woman, working mum or a return-to-work mum? What can I offer that no one else can?… If you can’t think of anything, think again! I guarantee there’s something that you have that no one else does.
3. What are my career objectives and what am I doing to achieve them?… I can assure you, the women you’re comparing yourself to had a plan and took action to achieve it. So can you!
4. How can I share and celebrate my own achievements?…. This is an important question because it creates positive intent and visualisation towards you meeting your objectives.
Most of all, let other women’s success INSPIRE you. There’s no ‘win/lose’ mentality here. Your time will come.
And remember, the more time you spend comparing yourself to others, the less time you’ll have to achieve YOUR OWN objectives.
Life’s hard enough without creating even more stress. So next time you find yourself thinking, “If only I could be more like her”, STOP. Take a deep breathe. Find in a mirror, window, puddle (it really doesn’t matter). Look at the AMAZING woman in the reflection and remind her of her unique gifts by saying, “Nothing compares to you.” Because it’s true.
#maternity #motherhood #mothers #career #women #workingwomen#maternityleave #workingmums #stayathomemums #children #kids#parenting #returntowork #maternitycoaching #corporate #business#businesscoaching #leader #leadership #manager #management#milanamaternitycoaching #melbourne #success #inspiration #influence#wisdom #like #follow #thankyouforyoursupport
SO YOU’RE THINKING OF RETURNING TO WORK
Well done on taking such a big step and for being ready to go back to paid employment!
Let’s break it down your CV preparation , shall we?
Name ✔️ (Check)!
Contact Details ✔️ (Check)!
Professional Profile ✔️ (Check)!
Education ✔️ (Check)!
Career Summary ✔️ (Ummm😱….)!
Maternity leave ‘resume gaps’ can bring on panic attacks for most return-to-work Mums. And they shouldn’t!
The key to incorporating maternity leave into your resume is to focus on how time spent away from paid work has given you a multitude of new transferable skills.
For example, have you volunteered to organise events at your child’s school while you’ve been on maternity leave? If so – VOILA! You immediately have valuable, hands-on marketing, net-working, managerial/leadership and cash-handling skills!
OR, maybe you’ve managed your home while taking care of your children full time? If so – BAM! You can add communication, organisation and prioritising to your list of skills!
See how it works? The next step is to ask yourself these two questions:
1. How do these transferable skills apply to my industry?
2. How can these transferable skills add VALUE to my prospective employer?
Most of all, remember to write and think about your maternity leave, and everything you’ve learnt from it, CONFIDENTLY – you deserve bragging rights!
Return-to-work Mums who can talk positively and productively about their maternity leave, their newly acquired and applied knowledge, stand out from their competitors.
For more information regarding our Return To Work coaching packages, please contact me on 0432 272295 or email@example.com
Love to chat! 🌺
Let’s talk about that pesky little emotion all working mothers can relate to – guilt!
As humans, most of us strive to be the best we can – for ourselves, for those whom we love and for those who depend on us. It follows then, that we may often feel not ‘good enough’ and that we, “shoulda, coulda, woulda done better, if only (insert reason here)…”.
One of the most consistent emotions for working mums (and dads!) is that awful pang of ‘ugh’ when they think about not being at home with their kids, OR for not being available for their boss, OR for not wanting to be at home with either their kids OR their boss!
To keep guilt pangs at bay when at work, ask yourself – “For what reason/s am I working?… And then – “What sort of role model do I want to be for my children”?… And finally, “How can I make the time I spend with my children more meaningful?”
Above all else, remember this – don’t confuse professional responsibility and your need for professional fulfilment with a lack of love for your child.
Remind yourself of the FACTS and when you feel overcome with guilt, do like Elsa and, “Let it go”!
Some days we feel like Superwoman and other days, it’s a struggle to put one foot in front of the other. That’s just how life is sometimes and it’s
The key is to continually work at moving positively and progressively towards our professional goals. This can take a number of forms and can range from making a phone call we’ve been avoiding, to updating our CV, to chairing a big boardroom meeting! It doesn’t matter. Nor is one action more important than the other because, let’s face it, some days finding time to do even the ‘small things’ is just as difficult as it is to do the ‘big things’.
… So, ask yourself these questions – what have I done today and what will I do tomorrow to move closer to achieving my professional goals?
#maternity #motherhood #mothers #career #women #workingwomen#maternityleave #children #kids #parenting #maternitycoaching #corporate#business #businesscoaching #leader #leadership #manager#management #milanamaternitycoaching #melbourne #success#inspiration #influence #wisdom #like #follow #thankyouforyoursupport
Gosh, Melissa Mayer’s ears must be burning.
Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the last few days, you’ll know that Melissa Mayer is pregnant with twins and has announced she’ll be taking 2 weeks (only) of maternity leave before returning to her role as CEO at Yahoo. And unless the rock you’ve been living under has been big enough to shield you from all aspects of the media, you’ll also know that rigorous debate regarding her decision has ensued.